12 reasons why libido reduces

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About Dr. Nagender Kumar

Urologist, Sex counselor

Why some people don’t want sex and what to do about it

1. Stress

It doesn’t matter why you have it — whether it’s from work or a relationship. Stress is stress and it kills sexual desire. Often times, sex helps people relax, but to do so one needs to at least start. A solution is to learn to relax and somehow keep stress under control.

2. Problematic Relationship

There are couples that arguments turn on, but this isn’t common. Conflicts, swearing, fading feelings, betrayal, and misunderstandings for obvious reasons impede sexual attraction. Sometimes it happens also that attraction disappears toward a certain partner.

Solving the problem is boring and lengthy. One needs to honestly analyze one’s relationship and understand what’s going wrong. It’s possible that your partner may have become unattractive to you and maybe you’re not spending a lot of time together and no longer feel proximity. It may also be that your partner is a manipulator and it’s best not to try to rekindle the passion, but rather end the relationship.

3. Alcohol

Yes, alcohol in small amounts is a stimulator that sometimes helps people relax and puts people in the mood. But anything in excess can lead to people being too drunk to fuck and if one is too into drinking alcohol, then soon one won’t want to love anymore, so spirits have a bad effect on the health. On top of that, a drunk person can be gross and repel the other partner. There is only one solution — knowing your limits and if you can’t, then it’s best to treat your addiction.

4. Lack of sleep

When people close their eyes a little while when in bed, they don’t feel like having sex. In reality, this is due to the fact that the need for sleep in the body is more important than sex and the body wants to fulfill the most important needs first.

People have it easiest that don’t sleep due to having a lot of things to do: people need to set their priorities and if one’s sex life isn’t last priority, then one can cross of some work to get some relaxation.

But sometimes a lack of sleep is caused by insomnia or sleep apnea (if you snore for example). Then you need to get cured and get some sleep.

5. Children

When there is a new child in the family, parents often don’t have time for sex, since everything is falling on them at once: stress, lack of sleep, problems in new roles and relationsips, and constant interruptions due to a baby crying. Fortunately, these are temporary challenges, but still try to at least give your baby to your relatives or a nanny for a couple hours to get some alone time.

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6. Medicines

Many medications reduce sexual attraction: these are tablets for decreasing blood pressure, antidepressants, and certain contraceptives. Don’t be too shy to tell the doctor about side effects in order to get other medications that don’t lower libido.

7. Low self-esteem

In order to want sex, sometimes you need to feel sexy. Lack of satisfaction with one’s body can be so harsh that one might not want to show it to one’s partner even if the partner is happy with everything. Their need to be two objectives in this case: to eliminate the flaws that can be eliminated and accept the flaws that cannot be. Lastly, one possibly might want to seek the services of a psychologist or psychotherapist — normal self-esteem is worth it.

8. Overeating

Firstly, overeating is dangerous. Due to excess weight people have issues with their vessels, hormones, high blood pressure, and illnesses develop in all the organs and systems. Under such conditions, libido doesn’t survive.

Secondly, overeating is often a cause of low self-esteem, which does not facilitate sexual attraction.

If one’s weight escapes the normal limits (or gets to an extreme point), then it’s time to think firstly about one’s self and get back into form. Libido then will follow.

9. Erectile dysfunction

This is for men. It may be that you want it, but it doesn’t work out well. In this case, one needs to see a doctor and figure out what’s going wrong and whether certain illnesses are causing the problem, which then will need to be treated.

10. Low testosterone level

The production of testosterone, as is the production of a lot of hormones, is related to many factors, both internal and external. Some of them we can affect: by changing our nutrition mode or by working out in order to raise our testosterone level. And one needs to remember also that sex itself affects this hormone’s level, so if one has the possibility to want it — one needs to want it.

11. Depression

This is not the type of depression that causes one to want to eat some chocolate and be sad, but rather clinical depression that needs to be treated, because reduced libido is far from the most pleasant effect of this disease. Yes, antidepressants also can reduce sexual attraction, but they can at least be chosen and changed until you find the most suitable ones.

12. Menopause

Due to hormonal changes in the body, women sometime don’t have the desire and sometimes have unpleasant sensations during sex: dryness or even pain. One can fight this by using lubricants. Good news: good sex occurs even after menopause ensues.

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